I was reading an article yesterday about a parks and recreation youth basketball league for kids. What caught my eye was that although it’s a league, where teams play against each other, nobody keeps score. It’s all for fun. Which begs the question, “Is competing against others not fun?”
Having worked at a few resident camps I have come across this debate before. It’s a big thing with some resident camp directors that there be little to no competition when playing sports at camp. Oddly enough, when it came to winning the Golden Dustpan for the cleanest cabin, competition was encouraged. Hmmm.
I understand self esteem is fragile and we don’t want to discourage kids from playing sports, especially since everyone agrees that physical activity is important, and losing games could do that. I also understand that parents and coaches can get crazy about winning, even to the point of fist fighting with other parents and coaches. But isn’t competition a part of life?
As a child:
You compete for a spot on the team.
You compete against other teams.
You compete in spelling bees.
You compete for the part you want in the school play.
You compete for the solo in choir.
You compete for a spot on the cheer squad.
You compete other schools in debate.
You compete to get in to a good college.
As an adult:
You compete to get the job you want.
You compete for promotions.
You compete in your adult sports league.
You compete with the television, the kids and the dog for your partner’s affection.
You compete with other businesses.
LESSONS TAUGHT BY COMPETITION
Life is competition and we don’t always win in life. In fact we lose in life just as much as we win, maybe more. What’s important is that children are taught by teachers, mentors, coaches, parents, recreation professionals, that losing isn’t the end. Losing and failing teaches us much more than winning. Did we give our all? Then we have nothing to be ashamed of. Is there something we can do better? Should we work harder to be more successful? What strategies must I employ to be successful next time?
Adults should be using loses and failures to teach kids about perseverance, getting back on the horse, not giving up. It can also be a teachable moment in regards to good sportsmanship and why modesty is a good thing.
As adults that work with children we should also mind how we handle defeat in our own lives. Children are perceptive and they notice how we react to defeat or failure. How do you handle it? Are you showing disappointment, hanging your head? Do you get angry? Or, do you smile a little and say out loud, “Well, there’s something I’ve learned”, or “I’ll come back better, stronger, faster and get them next time,” or “I’m going to keep trying until I get it done right.”
Playing sports without keeping score doesn’t encourage kids to get better, learn to strategize, or practice hard. It doesn’t push them to be their best. Would you play Chutes and Ladders if nobody gets to move their game piece ahead? Would you play chess if you couldn’t take the other person’s pieces? Would you play dodgeball if nobody ever gets out? Boring.
